Picture a tug-of-war contest. Two sides struggle against each other, straining to gain control. Can both sides win? Of course not—that’s the nature of the game.
In this message, Dr. Stanley sheds light on the internal conflict each of us must face: the battle between obeying God or indulging our flesh. It’s a high-stakes struggle with only one winner. But as children of God we’re not left on our own—with the Holy Spirit on our side, we’re each equipped with self-control. Learn how this fruit of the Spirit tips the scales in your favor.
[Music]
there’s not anything in your life you
can’t give up
when it comes to sin if you are willing
to surrender your life to Jesus Christ
and tell him I’ve made a blunder of my
life I’ve messed it up I’ve heard of the
people I’ve sinned against you have
sinned against my self sinned against
the people I love the most
God can you help me here’s my life will
they help you change your life
[Music]
four decades ago we started in touch
ministries to lead people worldwide into
a growing relationship with Jesus Christ
throughout the years we’ve seen God’s
greatness his love and his blessings in
such awesome ways that we just want
everyone to know him so let’s open God’s
Word and seek Him together next on
InTouch the battle for self-control is
there any area of your life that you
would consider as being out of control
what about your finances the out of
control what about your moral life would
you say that’s out of control what about
your relationship with other people it’s
out of control
what about your attitudes towards some
people like jealousy when you think
about your life is there any area of
your life that you say well I think
that’s out of control for example you
drink and maybe you take drugs
well maybe you gamble a little bit you
say
and what about gossiping what about just
having a critical spirit what about
being lazy none of those fit who we are
that’s why Paul said to the Galatians
the fruit of the Spirit is love joy
peace patience kindness goodness
faithfulness gentleness self-control so
when you think about your life would you
would you say that your life is not in
control would you say that there are
some areas of my life
certainly are not in control well it’s a
battle and that’s the title of this
message the battle for self-control we
all want to be in control of our lives
and now what I mean by that is this we
want to have the relationship with our
Lord by which we are submitted to him to
the point that we’re not always battling
because watch this when things are not
right between you and God it’s like a
tug of war God wants you to do the right
thing you’d like to but but but you
don’t and so there’s tension and stress
and uneasiness and oftentimes
unhappiness like a peace lack of joy and
lack of all the things that’s all just
mentioned you see you cannot be living a
life of disobedience to God and have
love joy peace goodness and all the rest
you can’t use their lump sort of happy
the way I am Sola but you cannot have
real happiness real joy real peace real
love when you in the Lord Jesus Christ
the nun in agreement with about your
life so I want us to think about this
whole issue of the battle for
self-control in our lives because all of
us either have had a battle or in the
battle right at the present time so
think about this would you say that your
life is under control that you have a
sort of a healthy attitude about all of
these things the desire for acceptance
by others how strong is that desire that
you have that you want to be accepted by
everybody else the desire to be loved by
others do you want people to love you
that is have a close relationship
what about desires for all types of
pleasure does that characterize you
there just whatever is fun whatever
makes you feel good for the moment
that’s what that’s what you’re looking
for what about sex
d/f sexual desires that outside the will
of God we’re living in a very secular
oriented society and Paul lived in a
society there was a cesspool of
immorality and so he knew about it
what about desires for wealth and
security where is that rate on your list
of important things wealth and security
what about desires to achieve in to
excel is that a healthy desire you have
or do you want to excel above other
people you want to be better than what
about the desire to be have no rights in
Fame
you see this is the reason people do
such atrocious things
it’s murdering other people there get
the name on television and the picture
and in the newspaper but look what it
costs them what about would you say that
you have a strong desire for happiness
if that’s true what are you doing to be
happy what do you being to be happy what
about your desire for personal
attractiveness is that wrong though it’s
not wrong but there’s that demand a lot
of your time both of you thinking do you
just want to look good or do you wanna
look good better than somebody else so
you feel the friction of that if I could
just if I could just fix my hair like
she fixes hers
well if I could just dress like a light
like she dresses or he dresses what
about a desire to control do you have a
desire to control over people somehow
you you just got to be number one and in
your business you are not number one but
you’d like to be you want to be and then
for example a desire for self-acceptance
I just want to be able to accept myself
the way I am
you and I will never be anyone else so
thinking about that no matter what you
are how you see yourself what you
intended
your life you will never be you will
never be like someone else
God made you just the way you are now
whether we distort that by our actions
and our attitudes that’s another
question but as you think about all of
these would you say that your life is
under control that you have a sort of a
healthy attitude about all of these
things now let’s talk about what self
control this self control is basically
thinking before you act which is what a
lot of people do not do thinking before
you act
and considering seriously the
possibility of the results that you have
would you say that’s true of your life
your life’s other control you think
before you act so the battle for self
control now beginning in the 19th verse
of the 5th chapter Paul saw sets us up
for the fruits of the spirit by saying
verse 19 now the deeds of the flesh
notice what he says there are fruits of
the spirit that is this is the these
things we just mentioned love peace and
joy these attitudes come from the work
of a holy spirit within us but notice
how he contrasts that in verse 19 in the
fifth chapter
now the deeds are actions of the flesh
the way we live are evident which are
and the first three of them have to do
with sexuality sin he says immorality
impurity sensuality then a dollar tree
sorcery enmities strife jealousy
outbursts Lavanya disputes dissensions
factions Indian drunkenness carousing
things like these of which I fall on you
just as I have forewarned you that those
who practice such things will not
inherit the kingdom of God now watch
this verse you may be seated here or out
there someone you’re saying then I guess
I’m not going to heaven because I’ve
done
than one of all those things the key
word in this passage is that I have
warned you those who practice such
things and so I won’t get into the Greek
of the overview but what that means is
it’s a way of life not not that that has
not happened in your life because more
than likely when I look at this list all
of us that some degree have it was
sometimes probably committed one or all
of those but it’s not a practice it’s
not a way of life for us when you trust
in Jesus Christ those things do not fit
who we are so he’s saying those who
practice such things it’s their
lifestyle a person who drinks all the
time it’s their lifestyle person who’s
always into something sexual it’s their
lifestyle you can just go out and then
bliss if this is your way of life this
is what you’re committed to he says
you’ll not inherit the kingdom of God so
we’re not saying that a person who does
one of these is not your to heaven but
if you’ve come to the place in your life
you practice those it’s the way you
think that’s who you are it’s because
you’re not saved you can’t live like
that continuously and gonna be saved you
say well now I thought no listen to what
he said those who practice those things
will not inherit the kingdom of God so
that’s our actions but what about the
fruit of the Spirit so let’s think about
that for just a moment and ask ask you a
few questions and well not think about
that and think about the society in
which you not live think about the fruit
of the Spirit versus what we live around
and ask yourself the question would you
be considered a follower of Jesus with
your conduct the things that you do you
can see and the think places you go how
you spend your money the words are all
those things in your life that you
consider important that they fit who you
are when you trusted Christ as your
Savior you turned your back on sin
doesn’t mean that you’ll never sin again
turned your back on sin
and so your commitment to the Lord is to
be obedient to him to walk in his ways
because you want the fruit of the Spirit
in your life of love and joy and peace
and goodness and gentleness and all
these fruits you want in your life
because you’re gonna be more satisfied
you’re gonna be more secure you’re going
to be able to relate to other people
totally different than what you used to
so as you look at your life would you
say at this point that you are walking
in the spirit and those who know you
would you say they know you as a person
who walks in the spirit something
different about you
or do they see in you this tension this
stress this anxiety this it’s like a
tug-of-war how do you break that tension
stress and all the rest by surrendering
to the Lord by turning your life over to
him by saying God the way I’ve been
living it doesn’t work that’s not the
way I want to live in my life
and I think about people who live their
whole life captured by some sin living
in slavery in their hearts and their
minds many people live and die and never
experience the love of God the goodness
of God the freedom of God the gentleness
of God the rewards of God live they live
the whole life and never experienced
that so if somebody should say to you
today
well at this point in your life whatever
your age where would you say you are
would you say that you’re a person who
experiences the love of God a person who
recognizes that he’s the source of
everything would you say that you’re a
person who loves other people you’re
happy when you see other people being
blessed you’re happy when you see other
people be saved you love listening to
the Word of God
could they be said of you or would you
have to say I can’t exactly explain it
but I’m really unhappy I’d like to be
different there are things in my life
I’d like to get rid of but there’s some
things in my life I’ve done I just can’t
give up
yes you can there’s not anything in your
life you can’t give up when it comes to
sin if you are willing to surrender your
life to Jesus Christ and tell him I’ve
made a blunder of my life I’ve messed it
up I’ve heard of the people I’ve sinned
against you have sinned against my self
sinned against the people I love the
most
God can you help me here’s my life will
they help you change your life change
everything about you
self come so would you say that your
life is under the control of God if not
let me ask you a question
are you happy no you’re not you
satisfied with how you’re doing in life
no you can’t be living outside of God’s
will and plan and purpose for your life
and be happy you cannot not real joy and
not real peace not any of those fruit of
it that’s not going to be in your life
the fruit of the Spirit not of the flesh
and the thing that concerns me most is
how people live their lives and look
back and think well what did this happen
to me well what what if well why was it
not blessed
was it not because you didn’t listen to
God if you live disobediently before God
you suffer the consequences in other
words all of us who claim to be
followers of Jesus there is no
acceptable excuse for our not attempting
to live a godly life whereby the Holy
Spirit is in control about thinking and
of our actions and when he’s in control
I think before I act and my actions will
follow his purpose in his plan in his
will for a life so what is the key to
our self-control and so this brief
passage of Scripture is Paul’s way of
giving us an opportunity to examine
ourselves to see where we are in our
relationship to the Lord so
self-control requires that we think
before we act you want to get that down
self-control requires that we think
before we act and this is the problem
people act before they think and then
they’re sorry and so you must have a
strong desire to obey God if you don’t
have a strong desire to obey God you’re
not gonna live a godly life
you’re not gonna overcome most anything
without that strong desire for him in
your life to enable you so you’ve got to
believe in your heart that the Holy
Spirit who lives within you is going to
enable you not thinking about this jesus
knew all about temptation and trials and
everything else therefore when he
promised us the Holy Spirit he knew how
awful society was in those days when you
trusted him as your Savior the Spirit of
God came into your life to enable you to
live in whatever society you live in to
overcome all types of sin so it’s not
just you against your environment it’s
you the Holy Spirit who’s promised to
give you whatever you need to be
victorious he’s there for the asking and
the yielding of your life so when you
think about that you think about you
have someone to help you through this so
you should consider seriously the
following questions think about it for a
moment before you do anything ask
yourself these questions
how will this affect me spiritually but
secondly how will it affect me
financially and how’s it gonna affect my
health many people today or where they
are physically because they have
violated the physical laws that God has
given us and then they wonder while
they’re where they are so oftentimes
it’s a violation of a principle God’s
given us so think about how they’re
gonna affect me spiritually financially
has
take my hell and how will others how’s
it gonna affect how others see me will
they look at you and say she’s really
committed to the Lord I can tell he’s
really committed to the Lord you will
never talk them and they go in a place
like that they will never allow that in
their life that is when you think about
your life how do others see you not
perfect none of us are perfect but do
they see you watch this do they see you
as a true believer do they see in you a
person who not only claims to be a
Christian but person who lives it out
not perfect but they see the difference
in you and so you ask this question all
these questions and ask this question
what are the consequences of my actions
to the people I work with do they see me
as having live the Christian life do my
friends see me as someone who is honest
today in this situation do others see me
as somebody who’s very reckless with my
money reckless with my morals reckless
with my attitude knowit’s is the fruit
of the Spirit evident in our lives every
day all day now think about this for a
moment God has provided his very very
best for you and listen I didn’t say the
best was easy it’s not easy it’s
difficult sometimes to have God’s best
but let me ask you a question what’s
better than God’s best nothing and so
when Paul wrote this hold a book of
Galatians he listened to what he says
for example he says in the last chapter
do not be deceived God is not mocked
whatever a man shows this he will also
reap all through this these four six
chapters he’s encouraging us to live a
godly life and what does he say don’t be
deceived I was don’t believe the devil’s
lie
you know as you you can’t you can’t mark
gods I don’t believe in God and all the
rest whatever a man shows he will also
reap although he believes it or not he
God is not marked for whatever man shows
this he will also read period you saw I
don’t believe you always reap what you
sow that’s what you’re saying God lied
I’ll tell you another reason you can
believe it look around you look around
your friends who drink who are on drugs
who are living in immorality day after
day after day who cheat when they can
live when they can and brag about
getting away with it you know you don’t
want to live that kind of life because
listen you cannot change the law of God
you can’t change his long as laws listen
whatever we sow will reap and think
about this
you’ve been sowing something all these
years they God says you’re gonna reap a
harvest does God miss anything no
there’s God it’s he a judgmental God
know what the problem is we hear what he
says but we don’t believe what he says
for example if somebody said to me I’ll
tell you what Esther if you just step
out all the way down here and here’s
what’s gonna happen if you do that
you’ll break your leg will not be
foolish to look down four steps and say
well I’m gonna do it anyway you know
what that’s exactly what people do when
they hear the word of God they listen to
the Word of God they say oh yeah I do
believe that walk right out and there’s
something totally opposite now listen
carefully
it is it is a dangerous thing to listen
to the Word of God and then deliberately
willfully knowingly disobey God
dangerous because whatever man shows
he’s gonna reap reap forty souls more
than it’s over later than so we don’t
like that part just because you’re not
having a bad time at this point you
life and you’ve been getting you think
you’ve been getting away with sinned you
haven’t gotten away with it I’ll tell
you why God loves you too much to let
you get by with it he loves you too much
for it
besides then he would not be being
himself God has chosen the very best for
those who willing to listen surrender
and walk in his ways he’s got the best
don’t look around and compare yourself
with somebody else God has a plan for
your life he’s got the best plan for
your life ask yourself this question
what am i doing in my life
that’s watch this carefully what am i
doing in my life that’s cheating me out
of God’s best what is it what are you
doing that’s cheating you out of God’s
best create your stress and tension and
strife tug-a-war in your life what is it
in your life that you just can’t let go
what is it in your life that you want
that you don’t have what is in your life
that you’re doing that slam the door on
the blessings of God when I think about
how awesome loving God is and then
people who hear the truth and walk away
thinking there are no consequences
listen to me carefully if you will
listen carefully you’ll hear the devil
tell you this the devil to say you don’t
have to believe all that you don’t have
to believe all that but on this side
yawn is saying you’re gonna reap what
you sow
we have a choice and I will say to you
it’s a dangerous thing to hear the
gospel it’s very dangerous viddy to
listen to the gospel and turn it off
walk away because then you’re
responsible but knowing the truth
denying the truth
and say no to God it’s a dangerous thing
to hear the gospel and it’s an awesome
wonderful thing to hear the gospel it
depends upon how you respond how you
react let’s pray father in Jesus name
what a critical moment this is the
people seated hearing people who are
listening and watching their eternity
may hinge upon their decision in this
moment Oh God
may your love sweep over them may your
love surround them and undergird them
may they be wise enough to recognize
that your God the only true God and you
have the best the best plan possible for
them from this point on if they’re
willing to say yes Lord yes yes yes Lord
in Jesus name Amen if you’ve been
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