Sex is a good thing, but our passion still needs parameters.
you can do a good thing in the wrong way
and it becomes a bad thing sex is a good
thing to little teach that in the church
we teach you know sex is dirty sex is
gross sex is disgusting so save it for
your husband
but the passion is pure however the
passion needs parameters if it is to
serve the correct purpose and what’s
gotten a lot of us in trouble in our
lives is we had a good passion but no
parameters
so rather than building purpose it
destroyed purpose and that’s what
happened to Moses he had the right
passion but he put it in the wrong place
and acted on it in the wrong way right
passion wrong expression look bring me
my um sermon illustration so like I was
just thinking of a way that I could show
you this a simple way to show you this
and it’s like imagine right now that at
this point in my sermon I know this is
simple just just go with me hey I got an
idea
let’s build a fire on the stage
I just think it’d be cool to build a
fire on the stage I’m stacking wood to
build a fire on the stage I actually
thought about how far should I take this
sermon illustration and I thought about
gasoline and I thought I would see how
far I could go before people started
leaving exiting the building but but I
think it suffice it just to say that you
know everybody in the room understands
the problem with this proposition and
the problem isn’t building a fire
the problem is building a fire in a
place where there’s nothing to contain
the fire it’s fine if you want to build
a fire but building a fire without any
parameters would be to unleash it
the same substance that warms your home
when it’s in a fireplace is the same
substance that burns a forest in
Colorado in the summer the difference is
whether it’s contained and when you
release passions that were intended for
marriage outside of marriage you’re
building a fire with nothing to contain
it and God says the fires a good thing
fire purifies fire brings warmth fire is
a source of life there’s nothing wrong
with fire but if you build the fire in
the wrong place if you put the passion
in the wrong place it will burn your
home to the ground
it’s a misplaced passion it’s a good
thing in a bad place and I wonder I
wonder how many of you would have
avoided some serious pain in your life
if somebody would have showed you before
you build a fire you need somewhere to
put it
and the only human relationship that can
sustain this force of passion is a
covenant relationship called marriage if
you go building fires and other
relationships that aren’t built to
contain the power of passion it’s gonna
it’s gonna spread the places you don’t
intend for it to spread and it’s gonna
it’s gonna destroy things that God gave
you as a gift and so Paul is not saying
put the fire out
he’s saying find the right place to
build the fire make sure you have the
right place for the passion or you’ll
get burned and I’m seeing so many people
and so many families get burned because
they were trying to get warm because
it’s cold out there and because I need
relationship and because I need somebody
so I think I’ll stand up next to this
fire I did a word study this week
I studied the word intimacy which is
what we’re all truly longing for it’s
really what we all want that’s what all
of our sexual expression emotional
expression is about we want intimacy
that’s what we want that’s what we
desire from God and from others we want
to be known we want to be accepted we
want intimacy but then I studied the
word infatuation and I was fascinated to
find out that in Latin this will make
you sound so smart at lunch this week in
Latin infatuation literally means false
fire looks like fire but really can’t
warm you looks like fire but really
can’t empower you looks like fire and
that’s what the world offers is an
infatuation with images of sexuality but
it won’t really warm you in fact it can
actually run away from you and burn your
house down and and some preacher needs
to get up in front of you and just have
the guts to care two cents worth of
nothing what you think about it and say
if you’re building these fires in the
wrong place is
burn you it’s gonna burn you
so it’s mismanaged passions passion is
pure the enemy wants to pervert it and
use what God wanted to use to develop
intimacy in your life to destroy your
capacity for intimacy so that he gets a
boy looking at pornography at age ten so
he can begin to rewire his brain and his
standard of beauty so that when he’s
having sex with his wife one day he
won’t be able to do it without conjuring
up images that he saw before he even
knew what was developing in his life and
in his heart because a fire got built
but there was nothing to contain it I
[Applause]
say this not to condemn you I say this
not to bring all your mistakes up before
you but there are some of you that are
building fires and bad places right now
sending text messages to the wrong
person right now visiting some of the
wrong sites right now filling your minds
with the wrong kinds of images indulging
in the wrong conversations it’s nothing
wrong with the fire it’s just where you
put it unless close talking about
something positive let’s talk about
shameless solutions shameless solutions
so when me and Holly were building our
home last year there were all these
selections that you have to make and for
the most part I never got involved but
she would bring certain things to me
that she thought I might want to weigh
in on and one of them was what kind of
fireplace we would have in the house
I love sitting by a fireplace I don’t
know why but I like the gas log
fireplace because this is about as much
work as I want to do
start the fire like to me that’s that’s
my version of roughing it like that’s my
outdoorsman ship right there
just flip that little switch and the
fire comes on she said no no for this
house we need to have a real fireplace
with like real logs and stuff and I’m
like oh god no I mean we don’t have to
go chop wood and go buy a flannel shirt
from oh maybe and I don’t have one in
the closet and she’s like no no it’ll be
great it’ll be a gas start fireplace but
it’ll have real wood and so I’m thinking
like you know I trust you whatever
and she said trust me you’ll love it I
said go ahead we can do it and then
nobody showed me how to use it so the
first time I went to go build a fire in
the in the gas start fireplace which let
me see I’m gonna give you the technical
explanation for this there’s a little
thingy that you put in the the hole on
there’s a thing on the side of the
fireplace and you turn that on and then
it opens the gas valves and so then then
you can light the fire least that’s what
I thought you were supposed to do is
turn on the gas and then light the fire
in the fireplace
so I was so excited to have our first
fire of the year last year and so I
turned on the gas to give it plenty of
time like you know if you turn it on
your car and they’re cold see give us
some time to warm up right and so I went
to go get my kids cuz I wanted them to
see the first fire and I bring them in
because this is like getting close to
Christmas time and their stockings up
and I thought this was gonna be a
picture-perfect scene and so I went I go
and get a drink and get the kids and I
gathered them around and I went and got
the wood not the wood that I chopped the
wood that the man who sold the wood to
me on the side of the road chopped at
some point and I took that wood and I
stacked it up high because I wanted it
be a good fire I wanted to make sure our
first fire was a good fire and now I
figure we’re warmed up and and so what
happened when I put the match in so like
now when I give an invitation for people
to receive Christ I give it with so much
more passion because I feel like I have
I have seen what hell is going to be
like
because when the when the flames came
out it was traumatic it was traumatic
for Graham Graham was crying I was
calling on Jesus Christ
I was calling on Smokey the Bear I was
stopping and droppin and rolling it was
everything I was checking for eyebrows
in the mirror lesson learned
start the fire in the fireplace and then
turn on the gas not the other way around
the difference between a fire that will
warm your house and a fire that will
burn off your face
has to do with the order in which you
turn on the gas and like the flame and
that’s what Paul is saying Church and
that’s what God is saying he’s saying
some of you are running the gas valve
wide open in your thought life and
you’re running the gas valve wide open
in your conversations and you’re running
the gas valve wide open and so you’re
getting hit by all these flames that are
consuming you and burning you alive what
do you expect when you turn the gas on
and leave it on and let it build up and
just think what you want and say what
you want you don’t control any of this
like how did you think this was gonna
end when you let the gas buildup in you
you’ve never got any help with those
issues and you never found any place to
discuss them and me where did you think
this was gonna end he said first first
marriage then fire context is everything
and some of you I’m not trying be
hateful I’m just trying to be helpful
just sitting here feeding the fire of
lust and discontentment and wondering
why have the flames are burning so high
you say well I just can’t control myself
you know that’s kind of what Paul says
in the passage he says for those who
can’t control themselves you should get
married you know that’s actually a poor
interpretation of the original language
in Greek he didn’t actually say for
those who can’t control themselves he
said for those who are not controlling
themselves see because he said that the
fruit of the Spirit is love joy peace
patience kindness goodness faithfulness
gentleness and self-control so you have
self-control but when you feed the wrong
fires all the time like some of you are
just throwing logs on the fire all the
time
and you’re you’re miserable because
you’re watching The Bachelor
no man will ever be able to live up to
your standard because you’re watching a
guy take girls on dates on a network
budget your man might drive a Hyundai it
may be a good car but you’re feeding the
fire of all of these ideals some of you
men have gotten your standard of beauty
from people who are airbrushed no wonder
your wife can’t satisfy you you’re
feeding the wrong fire it’s flaming up
and blaze it up and you’re running the
gas and you talk out you want to talk
and do what you want to do and say what
you want to say and now you’re wondering
why can’t I control this because you
didn’t control that so what do we need
we need a big ol ice bucket
you know what the church does and what I
used to do a lot of times when I would
preach about these topics I would think
that the solution for sexual sin is a
big old bucket of shame you know so we
just you know something like that and
all the sermons are based around shame
it’s like and that that’s effective for
like three days but then it flares right
back up
most of the time in our sexuality shame
is the source of our problem so it can’t
be our solution
[Applause]
Paul doesn’t shame the Corinthian church
he doesn’t shame God doesn’t shame you
for your struggles for your passions he
simply wants you to get them in the
right place hey thanks for watching make
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