After 20 years of marriage in the spotlight, Kirk and Tammy have been through a lot. However, with Christ as their center, God has continued to use Kirk’s music and their ministry to change lives for His glory. Join us as we chat with Kirk and Tammy about life in the spotlight and what it means to have a marriage centered on Christ.
hey there so glad that you’re joining me
today I’m Priscilla and this is the chat
with Priscilla it’s where we sit down
and we chat about things that hopefully
will be a blessing to your life today
I’m excited because I get to introduce
you to a couple that I have known for
about two decades now they have made an
imprint not only on me personally and
the lives of the people who are around
them personally but they have made an
imprint on the entire world I’m talking
about Grammy award-winning gospel artist
Kirk Franklin and his wife Tammy we
don’t have a great conversation today so
stay tuned
[Applause]
[Music]
this is a good day it’s a good day to
have a good conversation with two of my
favorite people on the face of there
because they are just funny they are
delightful they enjoy each other and
they enjoy life in general they enjoy
their friendships they have a bountiful
beautiful life and the beauty of it sort
of rubs off on everybody who’s around
them it was just earlier this year that
I got to celebrate with them their 20th
anniversary 20 years of being married
that’s a big deal right that’s a big
deal and they’ve done it beautifully so
I thought it’d be a good time to just
sit on the couch with them my friends
and talk to them about the beauty of
their life the impact that they’ve made
on the people around them but most
importantly how special they are to each
other there are lessons we can learn
from Kirk and Tammy Franklin will you
please welcome them to the program today
[Applause]
[Laughter]
he’s a character doesn’t know what he
does y’all character right now right now
you’re gonna sit right over here can you
sit cut well we need booster seats okay
well it is what it is swing you’re not
gonna close you got to sit alone was
good season costume play I’m Erica
lightweight look at lightweight yeah I
forgot my pants they got a life well and
we wanted to make them high so we could
see you it so now yeah well I knew we
were going to have a good conversation
I’ve kind of been asking them to come
and fill in this couch for a very long
time and the coat is not comfortable
they are I would have come well it’s not
just that what you’re busy you guys have
a very very busy life and honestly
that’s why that’s model reasons I want
to talk to you because everybody’s lives
are busy y’all’s lives is kind of busy
on ten just because you have a very
public life and still somehow you’ve
made it to 20 years of marriage you
actually still like each other because
there’s some people who are still
married but they don’t really talk
they’re not really friends they don’t
really have a relationship with each
other
and you guys do so I want to talk to you
about why do you think
do you think that is that y’all still
are kind of feeling each other after all
these years you go for high it’s kind of
cute you know I think you know one of
the biggest things we’re good friends
and that was kind of the foundation of
our relationship from the very GetGo and
so you know just like when girlfriends
when you’re kind of on the outs with
your friend you can’t wait until you
know things get back together and so
that’s kind of how we’ve been is just
we’re really good friends we have I mean
we have so much fun together and I think
that when you say just print our friend
of hers
yes mommy yeah get in and I and I think
that sometimes women don’t realize how
important it is for a man to marry his
homey it’s very important to marry your
best friend or your Road dog the person
you can laugh and you know you can excel
within you know take the bed sheets and
pull up with your head and have a look
acid oh my gasps you know PMI is very
important 12 I think they’re important
to magic supplicate your wife with you
and you know this but you know it’s fun
and that’s a me I’m so far important for
men to be able to do that yeah we ate
when William is very it’s very important
to have fun and be right silly in there
because sometimes you know the whole
title of marriage can be so heavy and
waiting kind of take the fun out of just
hair and cool with each other like even
being safe that you know you were never
like I remember when I was trying to go
to seminary for a minute and there was a
big picture minute because I have ADHD
yeah you didn’t classroom I was like
yeah squirrel yeah but uh it was a big
picture that the head of Jesus sitting
with the disciples and he was leaned
over laughing like like somebody’s yeah
Oh Craig it up at is well within
sculpture I know what you’re talking
about sculpture that sits right in the
middle of the property I think so yeah I
think so I was 18 write this okay don’t
got it but but I’m at
asking one supporters like because you
never because it’s very important to
show the humanity of the say the
relation couldn’t always see him you
know stoic again and I think that when
you think about marriage and you know
funny is my wife was a lot like that
when we first got married
yeah like when we first cameras we were
already a ready-made family yeah had a
son when I was seventeen know what I’m
say to each other daughter she was night
issues fast I was not you were not a
good house of a Christian girl that’s
all I wasn’t perfect she was she was
perfect to me yeah you know and so um
what we got married it was very like she
she was Verbier like like every woman is
you’re so much more mature than the man
it was much more mature extended over so
I was running to try to get away your
injury and I read heard you got peppered
high and so okay when we got married she
was very serious about the schedules and
the planning and I was going along yeah
and I would have fun with him I want to
play and I don’t know no I remember your
being but you’ve loosened up a lot to
Kirk he has yeah I mean listen up you
just always a loose got then well I’m
not particular about your life and about
Tammy and about you know and you’ve kind
of you know up 20 years you kind of just
gotten a little bit more relaxed about
you think well because you try to learn
because again you know your your
examples are also kind of stoic – yeah
so you try to name as they’ve been
raised in the church especially the
african-american church at that time it
was very much about yeah acting older
yeah because you know definitely because
it rode every ball and appropriate in
love even when we look at all the
pictures of us said we look
oh yeah yell ago you know but you know
you know you know give you because we
were trying to be old yeah you know and
I wasn’t anybody ever went to that but
you know you try to fit in in that
church system well I look back at
pictures when I was 24 years old and I
thought because I was kind of kind of
being directed toward speaking and
teaching and so everybody I knew that
was up on a platform was 50 and they had
on these
John suits you know the Sims from Saint
John and they you know it’s like
buttoned up right up the center my hair
was in a French roll in the back man so
I look back at 24 years old and I’m like
I was like a news anchor alright what’s
happening
those Nancy Reagan suits that’s right
that’s exactly right yes okay so go
ahead and guess because I kind of know
y’all story but a lot of people don’t
you know and the reality is you have a
very public very public life Tammy is by
your side most of the time we see her
there comporting you lookin real cute
come on Tammy a few interview yeah this
can’t fit we don’t we don’t hate you we
don’t we’ve a few make you hate you but
you are cute and I just you know we see
you guys so people kind of get a good
picture of you but they don’t
necessarily know the picture of you
together how did you meet each other and
then how did you come to a place because
I know it’s kind of like you know been
out you know yeah how did you get to a
place where you know I’m going to be
married California to her because every
time I try you know like most manny tell
the story wrong you tell story well
alright yeah fantasy not wrong but you
know wrong brothel heaven in me let’s
just say it at all I don’t have any min
him there’s a couple of an audience yeah
I’m here and Jer my husband’s here too
so he got you okay gotcha good help me
but yeah me go ahead our story is really
long ago someone trying to release a
condensed version but we first met when
we were fresh out of high school and we
were at a water amusement park in
Arlington Texas and it was then called
wet and wild but it was a water music
park you have to clarify that because
wet and water what I have found low now
it’s called it’s called Hurricane Harbor
yeah okay yeah and so I was there with
my friends uh-huh and actually the guy I
was seeing at that time he was there
with his friends we got into a fight and
so I end up going outside of the
amusement park and it was getting ready
to close and so I had on you know this
cute little yellow bikini looking kind
of cute oh and I had a towel wrapped
around my waist
and so I’m just you know sitting there
waiting for my friends to come out and
these two guys come and
that’s the towel off of me and kind of
start you know how horse slang and so
you know I’m already not in a quite so
good mood yep and all of a sudden this
guy comes walking up wearing was it
crossed colors or Willie wear one of
these watch one of those boy dressed do
you move across cover yeah I remember
cross y’all remember that anybody know
Monica yeah new kids on the block you
new kids on the block yeah and so um you
know he’s fully clothed remember we’re
at a water music part and so I’m already
looking like okay who do this so he
starts chastising the guy didn’t have a
jheri curl he didn’t have a curl okay
half a curl it didn’t really ever do
well they did never curl all the way
over to curl all the way up so I
struggled with it oh so there was a
homemaker like a James Brown yeah
everybody need to go back and look at
the hole yeah what a jerk about James
Curle Branca boy battle-ax corny tell
anyway so he starts you know really test
typing the guys and so one of the guys
goes you’re the one that told us to take
the towel from her because you wanted us
to meet you wanted to meet her and I
hurt her friended and I named round now
meeting him today no one can you
wouldn’t be shocked by that story right
because I mean he’s used filially all
the time what I remember most is it made
me die laughing as in or glass I just
bust up laughing and so then I’m
thinking okay well the God that I was
seeing at the time was inside could get
ready to come out I can make him jealous
so I’m like you just stand right here to
use me I did for a second and
and we begin to know to kind of talk but
the thing that caught my attention I
said what are you doing here you know
fully clothed yeah he said well I’m a
minister music and I you know I’m just
leaving the church well I’m a I was a
church girl and that just spoke volumes
to me I mean I didn’t think I even
realized how much it did you know being
18 at the time
and he was being so honest about who he
was and he was unapologetic about it and
so you know then I wanted to like really
talk to him so I was like let’s go over
here what we you know couldn’t be seen
and when you still walking around in
your bikini with a minute I have my
Chalobah have my channel how much our
back story gotten my towel back okay
that’s good so we’re talking and he’s
telling me you know we’re talking about
our you know what I mean it was a really
deep conversation because he’s actually
very deep guy we’re gonna tell you that
effort and so he began to tell me you
know how he wants to do music and he
wants to do it at a whole other level
and how he loved all these different
genres he said you know I’m a hip hop I
love you know classical I love
old-school I want all of that and using
my music and I’m just listening to this
eighteen year old kid like me who has
this vision and I’m really in awe like
whoa wait you guys I’m not used to
meeting 18 year old boys yeah we’re
honest about coming from church have
some direction and I wasn’t you know so
I’m really intrigued yeah well we
exchanged numbers and I really ended up
realized thinking that he never called
me but he did and he got my sister she’s
mean and you know we all we all kind of
have that yeah very big family visiting
everyone right here I am the oldest of
seven yeah and he got who the leader
protective should not mean to go so it’s
called and got her on the phone or what
happened he’s a lot house she do all you
stop it was awesome yes thank you for
Phyllis awesomely off she’s a sister
that wool like yeah a real staff were
you like you know you’ll be Down Beat
yes and so literally you know she ant
she answered the phone and but she was
sweet she was she’s that system is like
she’s not here
yeah and so he thought and I was so
timid aided by that folks her I was so
timid a I’m so timid a divided it I’d
never called back so I thought he never
calls me how do you never call so fast
forward I told y’all this was long I’m
trying to speed it up fast for three
yeah like years go by 4 3 4 C this is
Lemmy 1980 our 3 who we don’t agree that
was 19 oh my gosh my nose because it’s
not recording century cursed
thank you for my interview and that’s
right right right I’m trained I did this
I’m trained when he wants to be he’s
right okay anywho so it’s about three
and a half I’ll meet you in the middle
about three and a half years later and a
girlfriend my dad my mom yeah and a
girlfriend of mine was dating a guy that
was working on this guy’s demo and she’s
like oh my gosh you have to meet him
he’s doing music and his mic infused
with everything and I did not register
with me I’m like okay that’s cool and so
she’s like you should come to the to the
recording you know he’s gonna record the
demo at this church and I just said you
know I still think I’m interested I’m
not interested in meeting anyone my
daughter’s biological father and I were
no longer together and it just kind of
wasn’t interested and so she’s like she
finally convinced me to come Teesha yes
and we have a good friend tisha in
common and I’ll go to the recording and
he jumps out onstage I’m sure they
announcer with names jumped out on he
jumps out all day and he had this best
on his part that was like engraved you
know in his head was in the James Curle
was it there’s no more sophisticated a
more sophisticated feel curls working a
little better it’s a little better and
if you know it’s a little tapered in the
back and have any way have you seen Kirk
Franklin in concert because it is if
there is nothing kind of poised and put
together in terms of his presentation
you’re not you know when you think kind
of Christian worship artists been angry
aerobics I said it is it is the most
energetic amazing thing you’ve ever seen
because he literally is jumping around
for two hours and given the gospel like
he’s a preacher of the gospel of Jesus
Christ and that is clear through every
single stanza of every word that you
think and we’re grateful for because our
lives have been changed by your ministry
a lot
trying to get forces so he’ll jump out
on stage he does and I’m like did you
recognize I did immediately I said to my
girlfriend I said is his name Kirk and
she said yes and so I’ve been trying to
tell you about I’m like oh my gosh and I
wasn’t upset at that moment I hadn’t
thought about the fact wait a minute he
didn’t call me yes wasn’t bad it was
he’s doing it he’s doing it he’s doing
exactly what he said he was going to do
and so I’m literally sitting there and
complete awe like oh my gosh and so you
know the concert is amazing and it
eventually ends up being the why we sing
album I was about to ask him that the
lot we might be say yeah why we can help
y’all remember that song the reason why
I sing yeah so she can sing yes you can
not really
yes you can so here so after the concert
my girlfriend’s like why don’t you come
back and say hello
well you know the you know good little
girl and I’m like no that’s okay so
anyway I didn’t I told my girlfriend
that she can give me give him my number
and he calls me and when he was on stage
he was kind of checking me out and but
he did call him from the stage checking
you out yes I mean you know doing his
little moves any bad part is that what
he was I was a little artist checking
out a woman on the always America you
know he’s 20 year old 22 yeah are you 22
she was fine yeah beautiful and you know
and I mean she was my wife she was your
wife yeah that’s what I’m gonna yeah
yeah zero in on her yeah you clean that
up real good good now let’s go yeah you
clean kind of a lot of sanctified
answers yeah what’s good so so he calls
me and you know he obviously you know
was trying to check me out but he didn’t
remember me initially like that you know
as the girl that he met at the water MS
she didn’t have a bikini on and then I
was Oliver
yes yeah and so Gary would you come with
me brother
you know I said to him do you remember
me and so you know he’s fine you know
and I Reno refresh his memory he goes oh
my gosh I said you never called me yes I
did so we get into the back of
about it long story short we end up
seeing each other next day we got
married
shall we do not long till on number 21
years 21 years we have four children
still together homie I love her next
question yes I mean there’s only there’s
a whole lot more but anyway that’s
that’s how we met that was your question
how did you meet sounds at how were you
in there I mean that’s a good answer
actually we liked all those details
anyway yeah that’s good stuff right
there and for the people that are on the
verge of maybe blended families that are
in it right now and they’re trying to
figure out some help to really blend
well what are some of the hiccups that
y’all ran across grants some of the
lessons that you learned about how to
blend well well you know chemi comes
from such good stock her mom and dad the
end of the seven siblings that she has
is the blender stand as well right it’s
like the Brady Bunch that’s what we’re
all y’all yeah Cosby
yeah well I don’t know that’s good
anymore so Cosby Stowe is amazing yes it
is how the show’s good on they’ve
invited act up so she came from this
good place of having such a good teacher
cuz ya help healthy Emma’s dead as a
major mr. Collins yeah I’ll have his mom
it’s a beast
– yeah so beasts is good yeah oh yeah
like like like like for example it’s so
incredible Tami’s first cabinet first
year marriage
we’re married like 10 months but yeah
but tell Emma she was pregnant with our
first child and and we had home it was
house that I purchased before we got
engaged so we got married we were living
in this house
her parents were living out of town with
siblings they all came in town for the
holidays Christmas so the house is
packed full of a siblings and mom and
dad upstairs and tamid I get it to this
horrible fight I’m a horrible thought of
corn
horrible fight right and so so as with I
she yells our dad she said daddy and how
did she say it daddy
and no money I was acting a fool I don’t
say how the truth tell about this how
exactly the 26 year old fool yeah right
I let me tell me okay and so that’s the
fool and so she’s like Daddy and you’re
like it’s been a what you said yeah
thanks a ton of my dad say in front of
my dad I did I went total Supergirl I’m
like there’s I like better part of my
dad I started one of my daddy to pen
nerdy kid it’s like three o’clock in the
morning Oh our mom and dad come out of
the room that money and mind you I’m
adopted I have no mother no father no
siblings it saw me by myself what the
house full of my family yeah if I’m
trying to goodbye to my side well by
myself so I’m in house by myself no
family everybody houses our family and
I’m still nine ten months in the
marriage so when she yelled for him I
was upset and angry because again this
is the house that I bought before we got
married yes so I’m like you know I’m by
myself
yeah Tammy’s mom and dad came out of the
room at 3 o’clock in the morning grab my
hand grab Tammy’s Hanan in the middle of
that floor they both fell on their knees
I started praying for us yeah man I’ve
never had a day and I was about to say
you’ve never seen anything like that in
your life I don’t think anybody’s ever
see me do like that because when my
daughter would have been calling for me
if I wanted daddy how would a karate
chop that boy so bad
[Music]
but her mom and dad just mirror just a
horrible because for them your he was
their son I was behind and so they were
pulling the son and daughter together
and rebuking any spirit against this
Union man that broke me and I hardly
keep fighting in the midst of that oh it
was always on my side yeah yeah and you
know what you know this is what I want
to ask you I can’t believe how quickly
the time goes into the end of our oh
this just part
one just part one up but I want to end
asking you this question Kurt because
you brought up the fact that you’re sort
of from this for lack of a better word
dysfunctional family moment in terms of
your upbringing so this is the first
time as you’re coming into the Collins
sort of camp
I know it’s Franklin she’s married into
your camp but you’re seeing mr. mrs.
Collins you’re seeing a healthy marriage
where a husband is leading and praying
and people that are coming together I
want to ask you how did what you came
out of how did it sort of shape mistakes
that you were making or bents that you
had in what you tended toward in your
marriage and how did you find the
healthy marriage that you saw in your
in-laws sort of begin to reshape and
reformulate the way you wanted to
establish her own family great question
I was adopted when UPS 4 by 64 your
widow she was a widow and she raised me
on Social Security food stamps and
government funding my my biological
grandfather was at prison for murder and
a step-sister ad half sister with the
same mother to pretend I saw her father
being her he was in pray was a prison my
sister at the age of 17 went to prison
for 10 years at 13 I heard my biological
mother tell my adoptive mother I wanted
an abortion I didn’t even want him I was
raised in that dysfunction of being
rejected so I was born being a fighter
and I was always short I’ve been this
high since I was seven yeah you know
Jerry told me because he Jerry my
husband and Kurt were in church together
growing up go to the same church man I
told you how Tom’s Jerry Jerry six three
yeah so Jerry sakera me on my on his hip
just kidding you put me on Origin hi
Luke
perfect so I was raised being a fighter
she was raised being very solution
driven you know you know hey we could
work this out and I would fight and try
to push you away and be very quick to go
because I was it’s almost like I was so
used to being at you want abandon that I
would want to do it first because I felt
like someday you were going to do it
anyway yeah and so that type of
dysfunction of thinking I love me
everyone win and then I met somebody who
was healthy you know Tammy meant you
know and I don’t want to make me she
wasn’t perfect but brush she was so very
close hahaha we like Tammy don’t realize
Eric she saved my life
she saved my life she saved my life
because I was a really really broken kid
and and that drug was music and not
being erased at a very healthy Church
environment you know westport religion
because you know when you when you have
a gift
sometimes in the urban church your gift
can sneak you through yep yeah and no
one ever questions your character and
your integrity and so you can slide
through and you can date all the girls
in the church and do all of that because
but then that spotlight starts to burn
you alive because you have no strength
of character to carry you because if the
light shining on you it’s brighter than
the light shining in you and so what a
light shining on you will destroy you
destroy you yeah and and you were doing
destroyed I was getting destroyed
selling billions of albums yeah while
being destroyed yeah and then I ran into
a guy by the name of Tony Evans Thank
You Torian and another hero yeah you
know and I talked about that too much
I can do that too much I talked about
Tammy and Tony can’t do it too long yeah
Kirk Franklin will be at my father’s
house my dad is Tony Evans he’s my
pastor – he’s their pastor how long
y’all been at the church 18 yeah 18
years so
Kirk will be at my father’s house I call
your daddy’s but his best friend no no
my play for it then go play with your
play by the other night well he said
Kirk’s kind of like our fifth sibling
there four of us but then there’s Kirk
Kirk is our fifth sibling and he will
very consistently not only with your
father but with my father very
consistently pressed into that
relationship he’ll be over there late at
night he’ll be on the phone calling on
chasing wisdom chasing health chasing a
shaped mentality from the men who have
gone before you you’ve made that not
mansion which is not my natural nature
I’m naturally the one that’s afraid to
get on peoples nerves because I know
that he has kids and so I’m always
afraid of getting on your nerves but he
has so much of what I need and I’m
willing to run the risk of looking like
a fool hmm you know just I’d always tell
Purcell all the times thank you for
letting me get the crumbs thank you for
letting me get the crumbs because I take
the crumbs and I make a meal I make a
meal that it makes me a better man for
her for my kids and it should not repeat
the same cycle that my father and his
father the father made because that
whole history expanded but you know and
your dad’s willingness to you know
disciple him if you know he really
didn’t have that we first got married I
mean a lot of it went great I mean he
you know good pastors in his life but
you know I think that yeah but I had
pastors they wanted me to announce my
tithe yeah yeah because they wanted to
motivate the church deacon had a parade
per tablet area and a theology and as
hardwood theology yeah they were more
intrigued with celebrity Kirk Franklin
and but your dad gave him more this is
bad
in the hope that a pastor was you to
announce your ties yeah what is it
so you know I don’t cliff if you get
there late you got to sit there balcony
yeah you know your dad willingness to
give him what he really needed and look
past you know who he to ask him what
questions
and the heart targeted in business so
they gave me a new husband what is yeah
when it was time to join the church and
we were going through the new membership
program and it came up about baptism
well I had been baptized as I was for
cuz in the you know the black Baptist
Church you had to be baptized for you
could say in the choir I replayed house
four years old I didn’t know what to do
I know what I was doing I chose not
those kids no pool
yes go swimming in pools you know but
all of the kids were swimming in clothes
and so you have a but did you have a
shower cap on to protect your jheri curl
yes sir because David thought it was a
natural everything that axel yeah yeah I
want to keep that big you know I’d uh I
started going to the church they
misquoted the new membership program and
found that had to be baptized I went to
your dad head up sir I know that to be a
member you have to be bad pass through
the you know through the nutria program
and you know listen I set up I was 29
and I said I said I uh you know know
that probably other people have to have
my albums and you know and a little bear
saying the fact that they may not know
and I’m not anti so I was kind of you
know I was in stuttering I was kind he
stopped me said are you asking me to
give you a private baptismal and I said
well you know he said you must be out of
your mind
he said you have lustre if you think the
whole point of it is I like raisin you
want to get you say you won’t get your
behind up there like everybody else
I remember that down remember that fun
desu and the Sunday that I did it you
don’t remember what happened to you
Sunday that I did it because you know
when you get baptized family members in
the audience got thinkin you’re about to
say yeah when it was not having a better
has the whole music Ministry of the
church stood up there was a neat family
yes family family yeah you know so you
know it is it is incredible yeah I mean
part of that legacy legacy thank you and
well and now you guys are creating your
own legacy you have a beautiful
beautiful family of your own we’re going
to talk about that even more when we
come back for part two of this
conversation because we’ve got lots of
good stuff that we need to cover getting
to know this couple and the life lessons
that they have that are really helping
us to live our lives the best way we
possibly can so will you guys please
help go to say I agree great look at
they go clap it’s not a break that’s the
end of part one they go clap cause over
at home now
no you know hold on we still have to
take part – okay you just sit this is my
show gotcha better sorry I don’t I don’t
care how many Grammys you got all the
other Wars you know Madeline told some
of that stone will sell the W ideas for
people to the mass through much of their
granted to programs
Oh
[Applause]
[Music]
you