If you didn’t have a seat at WE23, WE got you! Our cousin Dr. Love McPherson shared with us how to navigate the dance of love with grace and a whole heart check for ourselves. ________________________________________ Watch the FULL “Hope for Love w/ Dr. Love McPherson” session on the Woman Evolve TV App. REGISTER for WE24: womanevolveconference.com Stay plugged into the Woman Evolve community: Download the APP: Woman Evolve www.womanevolve.com www.womanevolve.tv download the app from any mobile device’s app store, first 7 days are FREE! Want to support this ministry? Text WEGIVE to (833) 611-9066 FOLLOW US ON THE SOCIALS: Instagram: Woman Evolve and Sarah Jakes Roberts Twitter: Woman Evolve and SJakesRoberts Facebook: Woman Evolve and Sarah Jakes Roberts
have anybody noticed that they have the
uh uh they’ve had a pattern of choosing
the wrong person more than one time
raise your
hand guess what noer self might say this
noer self might
say and you know when you say what what
kind of guy you like I like somebody
who’s nice and Christian but I do like a
little Edge I like a little bad
boy notes to S would say
bad
boys can be good in bed but not
necessarily conversation
wise not all of
them bad
boys sometimes when they are taking
advantage of me will drive me to
work and keep my car to go visit the
side check and get
a note to
self how have you
forgotten how have you
forgotten you remember the trauma you
remember the breakup but you can’t
remember the incidents that you still
forgave the incidents because guess what
what overr you was what was happening
wherever it was happening the good times
forget that but I am saying to you all
we have to stop what are some other
things that we have to do specifically
specifically what we have to to see
is write down what’s reasonable and
what’s not you’ve learned your lesson
some of you all what’s reasonable you
say love am I asking too much I want
this this this yeah I know your list in
Clues with must walk on
water
let’s let’s look at some notes to self
about what’s reasonable and what’s not
what’s reasonable see I’m not going to
tell you your standards are too high
your standards are not too high I’m not
going to tell you that you asking too
much what I’m going to tell you is
you’re asking the wrong
thing you’re asking the wrong thing when
you ask no not to self when you ask
somebody else to make you happy you’re
asking the wrong
thing the truth of the matter is your
the happiness studies show the research
shows it is a 50401 thing 50% of your
happiness will be based off of your DNA
the stuff that Dr Anita talked about get
the sermon if you weren’t here 50% will
be about your epigenetics 40% will be
about the traumas you have suffered
since you’ve been here and only
10% will be about what’s happening right
now we think 100% will rest on a
relationship but you’ve got to get that
that the the 50% in order you’ve got to
to to work on that you’ve got to work on
the 40% and then the
10% is what you know that you need to
set some notes to self in order to
manage the second thing make me feel
good about myself what’s unreasonable
make me feel good about myself the thing
about that is this trauma distorts how
you see yourself therefore you cannot
get somebody else externally to do
something that you are supposed to
already be doing
internally what’s another note to self
you want you unreasonably it is an
unreasonable expectation for somebody to
fix your life you cannot ask broken
people to fix
you they got a full-time job working on
their self if they will work on their
self but your responsibility between you
and God is to work on you and then
another one every morning new fireworks
I see I didn’t say new mercies I say I
said new fireworks I see the thought
that every day will be compassionate
love is not not a reasonable
expectation I’ve been married for 40
years you all it’s not a reasonable
expectation and let me tell you
something love is a decision so I made a
decision to love my husband it was
liking him that was the The
Challenge thank God I still like
him
but let me tell you all something first
of all when you first meet somebody it
is a chemical like chemicals like
oxytocin and serotonin and uh uh damine
those are Feelgood chemicals that are
released inside of you that make you
Palm your palm sweaty you think about
that person all day you feel all good
inside when you think about those baby
you own drugs
okay but those drugs wear off within 6
months and you will still be chasing
your first
[Applause]
High because love goes from passionate
love to compassionate
love compassionate love can you handle
that can Your Love cover
compassion compassion for somebody who
is
5’8
compassion for
somebody who makes under six
figures compassion for
somebody who’s works hard will work two
jobs but still might be living at
home see let me tell you something your
love may not cover
that but please know this
the majority the average height in
America of men is not your tall dark and
handsome it’s
5’8
5’8 everybody say I’m looking for my
Boaz guess what Ruth was 40 and Boaz was
80 good luck finding your Bo
[Applause]
ass
y’all still want Boaz come on
[Applause]
Boaz the next thing that’s unreasonable
is give me
significance first of all do you realize
the statistics on that is the number
8020 the only
thing that your mate is supposed to
bring into the relationship to enhance
it is the 20% you supposed to bring the
80 80 you walk in with a gift look at my
80
baby he brought in with his 80 that he
has done on himself and he said well you
know what you got all this you got this
you got this internally externally
whatever I will enhance it with 20% we
think that they’re supposed to bring the
80 and we supposed to bring the 20
that’s unreasonable
what can you expect I’ve already talked
to y’all of what you can expect what
should you be able to expect you should
expect note to self I should be able to
expect someone not to destroy what I
have built a Lifetime
Building do not send wrecked wrath to
[Applause]
me to topple down my self-esteem to
topple down my my finances to take a
wrecking ball at my motivation to take a
wrecking ball at my mental health don’t
send W wrecked wrath to my
life and vice
versa Wreck It Wreck It
Rachel to diligently what else could you
should you be able to expect to
diligently do your work and support me
in doing mine don’t stop me from my
growth don’t compete with my growth
support me I’m not asking you to be my
therapist I’m not asking you to be my
savior I’m simply asking you to support
me as I grow and be
patient and vice versa what’s reasonable
to see me as a spouse and not your
savior I am not here to save your money
I am not here to save your addictions I
am not entered into any codependent
relationships
but you will enter into a codependent
relationship with somebody who needs you
if you don’t believe you have the glue
to keep somebody who will want
you what else should I expect I should
be able to expect that you have good
character that you’re not a a Serial
cheater you’re not a ghaster wasting my
time you’re not a bread prummer you’re
not a faking the success you in
instagramming it you are not a a liar
you are not a narcissist you have
compassion you have goodness you are
Godly I should be able to we should be
able to mutually expect
that