Lisa Bevere and Havilah Cunnington, both mothers of four boys, give you the tools you need to navigate the crazy season of motherhood.

okay I am super super excited about this

and I’m super excited that you are

joining I’m Lisa Bevere this is havilah

Huntington and we are doing something

we’ve never done together no we are

talking about raising boys and we we

were we were shocked havilah you put up

the picture of us and and then like wow

it’s randomly I thought you know we’re

gonna get together and we’re gonna video

a series on children and boy

specifically specifically boys cuz we

had like you think about girl we do boy

so you know we have eight boys between

the two of us yeah

and so we just threw up there and said

you know I thought well let me ask the

moms that are raising boys because I

know we have questions and I’m always

asking you about raising boys you know

what do you guys have and we were

bombarded then we had 550 comments

between the two of us that like landed

on our sites and asking us really good

questions about how do we raise these

like you said mancubs

or boy cubs I can’t call my boys anymore

they’re like sands and Ray Ray race but

yours are your mind like the Maggie cubs

yeah boy boy boy baby Cubs yeah so so we

are doing a motherhood marathon yeah

this is for moms of boys pretty much a

dominant question yeah had to do with

males and their body parts but we are we

are a few things I think we’re finally

empowered to do this question and how

did we connect because you have just

been a treasure but we only known each

other for the last year and how did we

connect well it’s amazing because you

know I’m this mom over in Northern

California who’s really trying to figure

it out you know at four we have four

boys my husband and I ages eight are

actually nine eight five and three with

these little guys and you know when you

have four boys I like to say like I was

raised in a girl family like I have a

mom I have a twin sister and I have an

Italian dad who’s almost a girl and so

like we are very like I was in a female

home and then all of a sudden I hear I

am surrounded by five men and so one

thing I learned early on in life was to

get a vision like find something that

you someone that inspires you and they

are your personal hope and so like I

personally were so I found Lisa and her

family and

they looked it was a beautiful picture

but I I really last age you know

whatever most of our lives are staged

when people are clean and you know the

diapers are changed but it you know it

was something right I saw her and I

thought like this woman her all her boys

are alive like that’s the first of all

other woman who’s lived in a house of

poor boys that are alive with their life

I mean she looked relative like gorgeous

obviously with like she looked happy and

those other things and and her boys all

had their limbs you know and so there

was like yeah there’s a major yeah so I

went I basically it was kind of bold and

I never ever do this but I put on my


hey if one of my friends want to

introduce Middle East Bevier would you

do that and I had a couple friends that

introduced Turkish I think it was Lisa

tour curse yeah yep yep yep

and then a couple other Lisa’s in our

lives and then and then I I think we got

at numbers and our exchanged phone

numbers and you I thought we would have

this really like distant texting like

hey love your ministry thank you for

being such an amazing hero of mine and

Lisa you you said you text when you go

I’m driving I’ll call you in a little

while and I remember thinking like

should I go get my bra like I’d like is

someone gonna see me like I just I got

really nervous and said no got my phone

but you don’t I mean in like let me open

my Bible and maybe I should memorize

some scripture second throw it out in

the conversation and I had this kind of

you know internal panic but then we

talked we talked on the and you it was

awesome your honor in an airport and you

were from the moment we talked to you

put me to use and we started this

friendship yeah and this beautiful thing

I found out that Havilah is half

Sicilian and I’m have Sicilian and so

that was an immediate like connection on

immediately I felt jerison if you are

dealing with all of this intensity on

the inside of an intensity and loudness

on the outside it can be it can be an

explosion really intense and then I

think there’s stripping my feminine she

started to be little pictures of

nature’s me

why can’t they keep their clothes on and

I said it will not stop or destroy

things that are destroyed or broken it’s

just not gonna ask you just right now so

like we did we did try to talk and then

recently I was introduced to a term and

so I’m gonna I’m gonna put anybody out

there if you are a mother of boys you

get to be called a mob mom mom mom thank


a mob lump even if you’re not Sicilian

like right we’re double still abide but

yeah your mob mom and so we put it out

there yeah 550 questions so much just

you know so many moms wanting to know am

i doing it right and my is there

something wrong with me is there with my

children you know all the things that we

face another hood which is just that

instantaneous do I have what it takes

for what’s in front of me and it kind of

brings up all the the you know the crud

that like comes to the surface we you

know that just cause you to cause makes

you wonder like do I have what it takes

and you know I feel like we’re faced

with our own humanity instantaneously of

I cannot hide I cannot hide when I’m a

mom they’re gonna see me every day and

day in day out so your questions are

really good and your children will

actually tell things in public on you

absolutely I felt like our third side

like my first two I felt like I could

brainwash them enough to like my third

side it’s like we have no secrets if I

say anything he’s like my mom said this

today so you get it the third one is the

charm on that one you know and I also

would say you know right away I want you

to know we’re not perfect no or not

we’re not perfect moms but there are

things that we’ve learned the hard way

that there’s absolutely no reason you

should have to learn the same lessons we

learned the hard way the hard way you

you are not alone and you are going to

make mistakes in your future but the

truth is God is bigger than our mistakes

and God has a plan and he’s gonna redeem

it and we want you to know we haven’t

done it perfectly but we have done it

well yeah which means which means having

a son that is 29 turning 30 this year

which is crazy 30 30

thirty-year-old so – when she was 27

yeah I got 56 this year is that right

it’s 56 Jeff so I have 2029 almost 30 27

24 almost 25 and 21 minutes so I’ve got

mine on the man stage and she has that

man in making stage and we’re getting

this together because have a lot we’re

actually commanded by the Word of God in

Titus 2 3 it commands us it’s it says

the older women must must must teach and

train the younger women teach and train

know how to love their husbands you know

how to train their children on how to do

good and so what we’re gonna do is we’re

gonna be open we’re gonna be vulnerable

we are hoping that you’re gonna laugh

and cry we want both of those extremes

so just be prepared and we we want to

open up our life so that you can

actually learn yeah from our mistakes

yeah and you know so have littell tell

the most challenging story you’ve ever


well you know I think initially having

my two boys I felt that two were

manageable again you’re you know like as

101 all that yeah it’s like you know

yeah what you can give it to somebody or

there’s a baby sleeping we had our first

two we had 17 months apart so I got

pregnant at nine months that was kind of

my I’ve realized I had some happy work

on purpose you know it was it was a it

was a week I mean we could get a woman

tired but we you know we we didn’t

really you know we didn’t really plan it

but it wasn’t we weren’t disappointed so

we had our two boys and by the third

something wasn’t right I didn’t know I

mean obviously life wasn’t right in

terms of craziness but something

internally wasn’t right for me and I

remember going to my pediatrician early

on and I had a baby that was about

that’s it was about three months old and

I remember going to the pediatrician

saying something is not right and she

said I think you’re dealing with

postpartum depression and I had never

heard the term I was a Christian leader

so we I mean depression felt like

something we had bought into I I didn’t

understand any of it

but I ran to a counselor who was a

Christian pastor in town that I went and

met with and she was a

using women and she began to help me and

I realized that I really did deal with

postpartum depression with a couple of

my children and that was really intense

exhaustion weird time you don’t know

like it’s like those commercials that

are like are you tired are you

overwhelmed that everyone’s like yes yes

yes but I know I did everyone should be

on that medication cuz everyone’s ever

what you know everything is happening at

us but for me I really came to a

breaking point in my in parenting where

I I realized that I had to set up a

healthy me and I I didn’t give myself

any permission for that it was almost

like kids were added into my life versus

me like figuring out how to do life with

them well and so yeah I had a crisis

early on and really had to walk out of

some dark places with the help of of

renewing my mind that was really and we

can talk clearly more about that but

I’ve got some real help in figuring out

and getting myself permission for things

to be good enough and not perfect that

was huge for me mm-hmm

and just realizing that it’s my family

it’s not anyone else’s family and I have

to do what God called me to do with them

and steward them so you know that was

kind of my crisis early on with my

kiddos when they were little and walking

through that and and I I wanted to have

a depression but my children would like

get on my bed and climb on top of me and

drive cars over the top of me and I

obviously just and I had a husband that

traveled full-time he only visited our

children and was home enough to pregnant

pregnant me into laundry but so so I

felt like a single parent I was

overwhelmed and I I had a list in my

head I had a list of what it should look

like I had a list every single day of

what I should accomplish and I remember

how about every single night going to

bed feeling like a failure

yeah every single night yeah I was not

able to check everything off the list

and I would think I yelled when I

shouldn’t have yelled I you know pinched

or pushed and said when I should’ve

probably just sat down and discipline

incorrectly I yeah you know I I I didn’t

get this clean I didn’t do this I didn’t

put all the laundry away and I would

just go to bed overwhelming every single

day and that get up every morning even

just more way down and I don’t

I don’t want that for you moms and

everything in life is a season it’s a

season and so you have to bring forth

strength and learning your lessons from

your seasons and so I’ve got the older

season I’ve got the grandmother season I

now I’m expecting my fourth grandchild

so I have two granddaughters and then

one grandson who’s turning seven and

then another grandson who will be born

in August so I don’t know when you’re

gonna be watching this but we have four

grandchildren so I’m in that other

season and so this is my season I want

to bring forth my strength into your

life from the season this is havelis

season she’s gonna bring forth her

strength in her life in this season and

we want to see you just really come into

the place so this is mommy marathon we

are wearing t-shirts we are not changing

our clothes you know this is real life

we’re not this is not glamour this is my

kitchen and we just want you to feel

like you are loved you are believed in

we have this list of questions that you

guys wrote and the truth is total we

kept seeing that a lot of them actually

knew their own answers yeah they just

really needed permission to believe in

themselves yeah no it’s true we do love

you where we are for you and we’re with

you and I think that’s you know one of

the greatest messages for us as women

and moms and grandmas is that we’re all

in trenches together fighting the good

fight of faith and what does that like

really look like so I’m with you you

know as you talk about the bar of like

what was enough in your life it makes me

want to get emotional because I think

every mom out there we experience the

sense of am i enough do I have what it

takes and I would love for someone to

probably take my kids away for a week or

two and I’ll get it together and that is

a common thing but I don’t think I don’t

think many of us and you know again your

questions kind of answered this for us

but you know there is this mom guilt

this mom thing of do I you know I I

didn’t expect that I had this dream of

kids and family and it’s gonna be

awesome and they’re gonna be cute and

this is how it’s gonna work out but I

didn’t expect my own internal battles to

be faced so I’m willing to deliver they

do delivery I’m Samir deliverance

ministry yeah so it makes me excited

that we’re gonna go we’re gonna be here

together we’re gonna talk about these

things and we’re gonna be

honest and I mean this is the hope that

I get cuz ubi says my friend but not

only that my hero in many ways of how

she’s done life and I I would love

nothing more than ask her these

questions so some of this is gonna be

just simply all of us learning I’m here

to learn and I’m honored that you would

tune in with us yeah and we believe that

this is a new beginning for you guys I

don’t know where you’re coming at but

but we are gonna pray that this is a new

beginning any guilt any shame any fear

you know we are not going to put more

pressure on you we are going to actually

connect you with the God that is the

perfect father and he is going to help

you with this and so we’re super excited

were honored that you’d let us into your

world we’re honored that you would let

us into our heart and we are so excited

about getting to these sessions of

motherhood marathon yeah so join us a

mom the mama

okay so we want to have an activity for

you you know how we unpack that list

that you go to bed with every night that

list that you never make complete like

maybe you completed it but you didn’t do

it perfect and that thing that you have

in your mind well here’s an activity I

want you to write that list down I want

you to write down those accusing items

that constant comparison whatever that

is I want you to make a list of the list

and then I want you to bring that list

into the presence of God and I want you

to ask your father what needs to be just

taken off the list how he looks at this

I want you to let him speak to these

areas in your life where you’re actually

probably doing way more good than you

are doing bad and here’s the truth we’ve

given you a lot of practical things in

this lesson and when you know to do

better you do better but you can’t beat

yourself up about when you didn’t know

to do better and you didn’t do better

this is a new day new start we’re gonna

write down the list and we’re gonna

throw it away you’re gonna bring it to

the Father and find out how you should

close your days and measure yourself as

a mom of men because we know that you’re

going from strength to strength so be